Well, I just made it through my second Mother’s Day without your physical presence. I had been dreading this day as I knew it would heighten my awareness of your absence. No, that’s not right, my awareness is always heightened. I guess, it’s just one of those holidays that you figure you will get to spend with your kids for the rest of your life. Even as children grow older and are unable to come home for Mom’s special day, a phone call or the like is usually made in the absence of the presence. Sadly, I did not get you in the physical, nor did I get a phone call or a text. However, I did start my day by seeing that silly little gnat crawling all over my computer while I logged in to roll the phones to myself since I was working and on call. The presence of that gnat was, in my mind, your way of saying “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. I’m here and I love you.” I never would’ve imagined that a gnat could bring such joy to my life. But, in typical Chelsea humor, that has been one of the signs of love that you shower upon me. The week leading up to Mother’s Day was full of hearts and a few gnats as well – almost like you knew that this holiday would be difficult and you were building me up to make it though this special day. Well, Chels, you did it – you filled me with your sunshine all week, which gave me the strength to enjoy the day. Now, Joshy and Maddy Mad came out to spend the day with me, which is always my favorite way to celebrate any holiday – with you kiddos! Betty, Ryan and Betty Lane came out to spend a few hours and asked to visit your tree. Of course, Scotty was there along with Kassie. All the wonderful signs from you mixed with the presence of the people I love so dearly made for a very pleasant day.
Life is full of surprises. I would have never dreamed that I could be so in tune with your energy, but here I am feeling your presence in my life even when your physical self is no longer walking the earth. Sometimes, I think I am just crazy and playing a lot of mind games, but then I see one of your signs and “that feeling” goes all over me and I know its you! Unfortunately not everyone is open to feeling or receiving messages from their departed loved ones, so I am so grateful to you for your persistence in making sure that I see your gifts of love. I don’t pretend to understand how it all works – life after death – it remains a great mystery and will until the day I die and join you on the other side of the veil. Until then, I will watch for your gifts of love and keep smiling when that little gnat flies around my face and makes its presence known.
I love you to the moon and back times 2!